The process

I never feel like myself nor do I see anyone be who they once were to me, at least that's what I seem to see.
Distorted figures, maybe, the shortness lingers and takes over me.
Why is this sea so blue and deep?
Why does it keep drowning all of the free spirits in me?
I swim back up to the top with no air left in my lungs to breathe, my vision is blurry and I cannot seem to see clearly.
I walk around with my heart in my gut and my soul feels so stuck.
I go no where and I touch no one, I stay in this place and seal the door shut.
Everything is retraced because nothing there could ever be replaced.
It may seem like a safe place to hold my space, but it always leaves a bitter taste in the memories I chase.
I can never shake this feeling so I never feel safe, let alone save any face.
I pace myself so that I may change myself, I grace myself and reach for help.
I take a bow and show them how it's all mine now.

Static

What am I doing to make you feel in such a way that makes you feel my pain?
How can I erase this stain that stakes your being into this emotional strain that's causing your decay?
My words cut you so deep, they seep into everything in you that reverberates back to me.
Recycled toxicity, it's not healthy, it's not where I wanted this to lead.
I cut you, you cut me, I cut you, you cut me, it needs to cease.
Can we try to find some peace or will we tear each other up until we're in pieces?
Because when it comes to you there is no in between, all in or it's all thin.
Stay and see or forever hold your peace.

Again

It's that time of year when its always really weird. 

At first it doesn't phase me, but then the heaviness grazes me. 

I sink into myself and don't see anything else.  

Nothing ever really makes sense until I go into those depths.

 I take a look around and notice every memory that leads to nothing but frowns. 

It always brings me down and shows because it's not afraid of the crowd. 

None of this tries to hide nor does it try to lie, its all the brutal truth and it never seems to move. 

It has always stuck around, it is not too far from underneath my ground. 

I grab my shovel and bury it all over again. 

I then get a sense of relief and a hint of regret because I feel it happening all over again.

3:33

Lost the battle, win the war, yeah I know you've probably heard it all before.
From waking up from these dreams that leads to the feeling of constant defeat and never knowing when to stay or when to leave.
Fighting things that are far from these dreams, but just distractions from seeing the whole scene.
Will it stop?
Will it change?
Will it all go away?
Can you breathe?
Can you pray?
Can you make it another day?
"It'll get better" they say, and insist that you move along and wake up to a fresh day. 

It's a clean slate, more room for change, more room to grow, more room for you to know all that you have yet to be shown. 

Stay on your toes because you never know when it'll be your turn to glow. 

Stay sharp, stay kind, and always keep in mind that this life is a constant flow of people and feelings that come and go. Sometimes they stay to help you make it through all of the healthy change that you need to break away from all that keeps you chained.

Bound-aries

You say you're done, but are you really done?
You say you've won, but have you really won?
We tend to get lost between these lines and thoughts, but we always find our way back to the lines we have crossed.
Wandering in the ambiguity of all that has been drawn out for you to see.
Between what is said and unsaid and what is done and undone, there is always the middle grounds where the seams can be seen.
Things may seem to make some kind of sense, but there is no reason to stay upset.
Just move along and take another step and be cautious enough to not fall into another trap.